Choices in our Salad Bar Life

Life is like a salad bar, but unlike a box of chocolates, you know what you are going to get. Everyday we have the option to choose between the macaroni salad and the cottage cheese. Choices laid out in front of us, everyday make up who we are and what we become. It all seems simple enough, but ultimately what we decide to fill our plate with is what makes up our meal. A seemingly non-life changing choice to eat cheeseburgers every day, will eventually end in high blood pressure and stroke.

The problem with so many options is, we want it all, but beets and chocolate just don’t mix. We may like both, but only one will get us to our perfect salad bar plate. If we want to live true to ourselves and practice what we preach, we can’t always pick what feels good in the moment. We have to continuously make the choices suited to our goal.

If anyone were to look at my personal Facebook page, they would meet the me that I pretend to be: kind, confident, has it all together, adventurous, perfect me.  Happy perfect faces we scroll by on social media are really just snapshots of the we want others to see. I wish I was the person I portray myself to be. The reality of my life is much different from that Utopian world. Just as we pick and choose what photos to post, we also get to pick and choose what actions we take.

I have many goals in life. I want to be a writer for instance, but when I belly up to the salad bar I don’t always choose the options that will further my goal. Finishing that article versus drinking with friends?  I know what I would prefer to do, but I also know what I should do. I have to ask myself daily, am I who I want to be? What choices can I make today to get me there. Sometimes the simplest things prove to be the hardest.

Like the salad bar, adding a poor choice to an otherwise perfect salad can ruin all the previous choices. When we decide to pick and choose what rules we want to follow and when we want to follow them, we struggle to live true to our ideal selves.  If I want to be in shape and loose weight, I know it will take hard work at the gym, and I will have to make the choice of spinach over cake. The same goes for any religion you practice. Can you treat others how you would like to be treated and then turn around, and show little tolerance for people you perceive as being beneath you. We may say we want to be good husbands or wives and then, act selfish and inconsiderate to our spouse. How often when the choices to be the better person come up do we act upon them? How often do we practice what we preach, choose patience over agitation, understanding over intolerance or love over hate? We all have free will to make whatever choices we want but if we are striving to be better we need to live the whole truth, not just picking the parts we like, when we like.

There is a quote in the bible I feel fits this very well.

“No one can serve two masters, Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You can not serve both God and Mammon.”  Matthew 6:24

Two masters can mean anything. Perhaps its between who you want to be versus being comfortable. Maybe it is choosing between the religion you profess or something that goes against it. Unfortunately, in order to grow into our accomplished selves, we can only choose one master. We can’t always have both.

Sometimes we need to scrape the poor ingrained choices off of our plate. There was a point in my life where I lived for myself, I always choose fun over responsibility, and selfish acts over compassionate ones. My choices were leading me down a path that was against what I really wanted for myself, but it felt good at the time. All my self-indulgence just lead me to a unproductive and unfulfilled life. I had to choose differently.  Cleaning off your plate of poor choices is imperative for success. If we never clean our plate off and get rid of the things in our life that don’t fit, the overall picture we have for ourselves will never manifest. This could be people, habits, or whatever is in your life that doesn’t align with your goals or beliefs.  I used to be a loyal friend until the end. I would help you “bury the body” kind of friend, but then I figured out that I don’t have to go down with their ship. I don’t have to be an alcoholic because they are. Continually choosing against our ideals can guarantee continually being disappointed. Stop salad baring your decisions, and start making decisions that bring you to your goals. Maybe the macaroni salad, although tasty isn’t the best choice.

Life is hard, with a multitude of choices and ways to live its hard to pick between cottage cheese and the potato salad. There will always be the temptation to fall off your path or to load your plate with things you want in the moment, but you may regret it later. Some items are easier to clean off than others, but even if you have a sticky mess, it is best to choose the path that gets you closer to that ideal salad plate. At the end of the day, it is what you put on your plate that will make up your meal.



The Art Of Compromise is Dead.



These are scary times we live in. Times, due to social media anyone can share misinformation at will, and we (collectively) are OK with it. When I was younger I believed people were inherently good, and sometimes did bad things. As I aged I have come to witness people being selfish, rude and downright diabolical, only doing good deeds as long as someone is watching. It seems that we are playing a massive game of do whatever it takes to win. One has to look no further than our political landscape to see this deceitful scheme in action. Scary times indeed, devoid of compassion, compromise, forgiveness, and truth.

I Hate discussing Politics. For one thing, I refuse to pigeon hole myself into any groups opinions, or positions, finding it impossible to completely agree with one of two parties entire platform. Despite my aversion to passion filled arguments, I sometimes trip and fall head first into the depths these discussions. The possibility of having a civil discussion is thrown out the window, along with compromise, as we sling pure shit at each other to get a point across that neither side will concede to or try to understand. It seems to me that both sides swing to a radical conclusion when an issue is brought up and end up closing off all talks about it. For example, stronger gun control does not equal storming your house and seizing your guns. Are we basing our convictions about the other sides position on an irrational fear instilled from the other side.? Just because, a president is against abortion doesn’t mean he plans to abolish it, get a grip.

More often than not political conversations lead to complete ridiculousness. The president hates Women, because of an off hand comment made 13 years ago at a party. or, the democrats are communists, insert absurd reason here.  Exchanging miss- captioned memes or some other post on social media containing a sliver of truth, blown out of proportion and context, with the intention to prove how evil the other side is.

All this blaming and name calling is reminiscent of 6th graders at recess, it is downright immature and I fear it will lead to more extreme measures. As the rhetoric increases and both sides become desperate for votes and approval, without having to stand on the issues alone, will we see more lies and scandals? Will the public be squeezed between false accusations and petty inferences in order to gain power and notoriety? These so called professional adults are acting out like, little kids who behave poorly when they are not getting enough attention. The megaphone just keeps getting louder until the art of compromise, is completely lost to a media circus of miss- information.

One side blames the other for cheap political tricks and pettiness. The truth is both sides are equally guilty of the same thing, wagging their pointy fingers at the other side when they themselves have committed the same supposed crime.  How long did it take republicans to accept the fact that Obama is an United States citizen? (That whole thing was just ridiculous) How many are still protesting the election of our current president? The nit picking of sentences, often times taken out of context, has reached a level of complete misinformation, and gossip reflecting the intellectual capacity of 13 year old girls.  Personally ,I could care less if Bill Clinton smoked Pot in college, or had sex with interns. Please, insert any other out of context, cheap shot that proves that the candidate is human, here.  Both are guilty of the same non-sense Period.

None of these smear campaigns are new, it seems to be the way we operate. Instead of actually addressing the issues and what they stand for, political commercials are based on why the other candidate is evil, complete with black and white footage and bold red lettering to hit the point home. I would love to Impose a ban on all smear campaigns and let candidates stand on their own for once, but I digress. What has came to light recently, that is truly heartbreaking to truth seekers, and is beyond smear campaigns. Currently we had the Kavanaugh debacle. People, handing out shame filled hate  about electing a supreme court justice that was accused of rape, rightfully so. However many derogatory comments, and friends lost over  the ordeal, it turns out, two of the accusers admitted to lying.  Although one of the accusers states she was forced into her confession, making finding the truth more confusing than ever. I can’t even discern what to believe anymore. We have gone far beyond smear campaigns into outright Deceit. Makes you wonder if you can believe anything. How low are we willing to go in order to gain power. What other lies have we been told, that we don’t know about?

Politics is supposed to be the art of compromise, not the art of demonizing your opponent to obtain votes. Not the art of cheating, fake votes, lies, fear mongering, and smear campaigns.  Politics should be about presenting a problem and discussing the solutions of varying opinions to come up with a result that is satisfactory to all parties involved. It appears that this is no longer the case. It appears as if we have all channeled our inner child and decided we want the cake and we want to eat it too. We have began living in a system where nobody wins, and it is currently filled with lies, false flag operations, cheating and hate. Today’s politicians seem to be out for themselves, despite what the people want. Manipulating and swaying public opinion to suit their needs ,and take away the informed choice of the people.

I have officially lost faith in the government and said institutions. How can the people have a voice when, the media speaks for them? How can the people have a voice, when the government is running false flag operations, and taking away the peoples ability to make a choice based on truth. I am not one for conspiracy theories, but perhaps there is something to them? Perhaps its time to take the tin foil hat out of the closet. When it becomes so obvious that we are being lied to, I cant help but wonder if the whole thing is a sham.  If the whole point is to divide the people, among themselves. For we have no power when we are Waring  against each other.

The art of compromise is dead when it comes to politics.

We the people have more power than any politician will have you believe. If we can stop needlessly fighting each other and come together, If we can infuse a little bit of love, compassion and understanding into how we treat each other, If we could just stop attacking each other for our beliefs and start respecting our differences, than maybe real positive change could be possible. We the people must demand  honesty from our government and the people who represent us, and each other. We need to demand hate, lies and deceitful political tactics end, instead of feeding into the obvious plot to divide us. If we could understand that it is our differences that make us strong, just maybe we can bring to life the art of compromise.


You may say I’m a dreamer, But I’m not the only one – John Lennon